Baby Girl
by aliceann
Summary: Neal is depressed following his kidnapping at the end of season 5. Peter tries to help him, without much success. A chance encounter changes everything for them.
1. Chapter 1

**BABY GIRL**

**Chapter 1**

Despite everything life had thrown his way, he wasn't afraid to love. Love without reason, all consuming, imperious and demanding. The kind that made him make a complete and utter fool of himself, the kind he felt for Kate. Love still seemed possible even after that pain. When surely it would have been far wiser to give up completely, he remained convinced love would win out in the end. The affliction was in his blood. That all changed when he was taken.

He had learned to live without his freedom and now he had come to learn he couldn't any longer. He couldn't love without it. It wasn't a full life he had bargained, yet now it didn't seem like life at all.

He was sad. His sadness was rising up from roots long ago buried, now pushing their way to the surface, threatening his fragile peace. Lying held no value. He didn't try and charm. He was too tired. Peter said it would do him good to get out of the city. Peter had taken him to the hospital and then to specialists and now to his family's cabin upstate. He felt like a package that was undeliverable.

On the ride up Peter's thoughts were interrupted by the haunted look in Neal's eyes when he found him. They'd kept him in a wire cage in the dark for weeks, the frame was so tight against his torso he couldn't fully expand his chest. His imprisonment was torture pure and simple, all about limits, human endurance and payback. He cleared the image from his head.

Peter got out of the car first and grabbed his bag from the back seat. Neal was pulling gear from the trunk when he came up beside him. He absently placed his hand on his friend's shoulder and could feel the slightest shiver as if he had touched an old wound. He hoped it hadn't left a permanent scar. The beauty and stillness of the woods calmed him, it had since he was a boy.

"I have something for you." Peter pulled a box out of the trunk.

"So what is it?"

"Go ahead, open it."

Inside was a red thermal vest. Neal looked at it blankly, a vague ache in his stomach. The man who once wanted everything, seemed now to want nothing at all. It had all floated away from him, with a regret more reflex than real.

"Thank you, Peter."

"From the look of those clouds it's going to snow and you'll need that. Come on, let's get inside."

The moment Peter stepped in the cabin, he was swept up in nostalgia. The Mr. Coffee his dad bought when he was a boy still sat on the maple wood counter. He ran his hand along the surface and put his jacket on the hook next to the window overlooking the lake. Memories of the end of winter played in his mind, he and his father fishing the crystal blue lake, even before the last snow had melted. His father always took things well. He could talk to him about anything. He still came to him for comfort and advice. His overlong hugs had a way of making everything seem absolutely fine. Tomorrow he would take Neal down to the lake.

"Hey buddy, why don't you go unpack your stuff. I'll get some wood for the stove. First room off the hall is yours."

"Sure you don't need some help?" Neal asked politely.

"I'm good. I want to get dinner going. It's Elizabeth's Irish stew recipe, the one you like. I'll be right back. Holler if you need something."

Peter watched Neal head down the hallway. He hoped the fresh air and exercise might improve his appetite. The doctors gave him a clean bill of health, said he would eat when he got hungry enough. But he didn't. Neal didn't seem hungry for anything. It twisted his heart to watch. He continued to press for Neal's early release, but the kidnapping seemed only to strengthen the Bureau's case to keep him on indefinitely. They argued he was safer under their protections. They didn't understand protecting Neal Caffrey belonged to him.

Neal stood at the open window, the cold air hurt his chest as he breathed. His lungs seemed to have permanently adjusted to taking in the least amount of air to maintain life. He watched Peter dodge a pine bough as he gathered the bundle of wood set along the low stone wall. Peter stood for a moment and arched his head back, taking a deep breath as if he smelled answers in the blue pines across the lake.

He remembered the day Peter found him in the dark, caged…trembling for his sanity. It was a memory he was almost successful in forgetting, but sometimes little bits of it rose up and floated on the surface of his consciousness. Peter spoke to him so softly he couldn't tell if his voice was inside his head or not. Time stopped. It was like Peter projected a small force field around him. The very molecules in the air vibrated from the heat of it. It was enough to make him cohere when he was falling apart. He could see the source of it flickering in Peter's dark eyes.

When he stopped sleeping and eating, the force field maintained him in cold waiting rooms, steadied him through conversations with well-intention-ed specialists and silent drives home to June's afterward.

"_Neal, I talked to the D.C. office about your appeal. I think we have a real shot at a reversal of the terms of your probation." Neal didn't say anything. He had no idea what to say, so he said what he always did._

"_Thank you, Peter."_

"_Neal, you got to talk to me buddy. I'm trying to help here."_

"_I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he heard himself say over and over until Peter pulled the car to the side of the road._

"_It's okay Neal, its okay. We'll just take everything one day at a time." He saw it flicker in Peter's eyes. It was enough to allow him to rest, sleep a little and not think or feel quite as much._

More and more frequently the force field was fading, threatening to go all together and let in the darkness creeping into his soul. He wanted to scream "Hurry Peter, before it's too late." But he only spoke in whispers now. Peter tried. He was trying still. Neal watched him gather up the wood and head back to the cabin, completely unaware of his super powers.


	2. Chapter 2

**BABY GIRL**

**Chapter 2**

Peter was at the stove stirring a large cast iron pot. He seemed so far, even though he was standing feet away from him. Increasingly he was in a different world than he was. He didn't know how to explain it to Peter. He didn't understand it himself. It was like a stone inside him.

"I was just about to come and check on you." Peter said.

"Oh," Neal nodded.

"I hope you're hungry. Got to keep your energy up." He lifted a large wooden spoon and a drop of steaming liquid fell back into the pot. Peter came forward grinning affectionately with the spoon in hand. The same large competent hands that lifted him from the cage.

"Here, taste this. What do you think? Need salt?"

"Umm," he felt sick as the liquid ghosted over his tongue, it had bits of carrots and onions in it. He wished he could be hungry, he knew he wouldn't be able to eat it salt or not.

"Maybe salt," he said as Peter watched him, smiling.

"Good. El would have my head if I ruined her stew."

He knew Peter would always go on being his friend, no matter how much he disappointed him. He stepped back, shamed.

"What?"

"Nothing. How long till it's done?"

"Another hour at most. Why?"

"I think I'll go for a walk." He couldn't bare one more moment of disappointing him.

Peter knew how hard being confined now was for Neal. He could see it in his face, in his body. He could see him disappearing every day, retreating to some incomprehensible refuge. Looking at him with nostalgia as if he was something past. He closed his eyes, then opened them slowly. He had opened the door to Neal and like a beautiful tornado he turned his world inside out and upside down. He thought then he was doing him a kindness, protecting him, while all the while he was saving himself. He never felt more alive since Neal came into his life. He never felt more afraid.

"I'll come with you. I could use a stretch."

"Thanks, but I'd like to be alone, clear my head. I'll be much better company when I get back."

"Neal," he says.

"Yes, Peter."

"Take this. It's your thermal vest. You'd be so surprised how fast it can get cold out here."

Peter wondered what it took to dismantle a life. He wasn't there, but he was here now and he'd be damned if they would take any more from him. He needed Neal to tell him how to make it right.

Neal took the vest and headed for the doorway, but stopped at the threshold. He could feel it reaching out to him, drawing him back to everything he had left behind. Peter's force field, unbidden but expected. He wanted to protect him from the horrors of the world. He wasn't there.

Peter imagined he could escape paying for all the things he'd stolen, all the second chances he gave away like gifts free of charge. He was wrong. There was a price to be paid. He deserved it. It was long overdue. When they lifted him from the cage, he braced himself for it. He waited on the pain, and when it didn't come he collapsed into shadow…ashes. He turned and looked at Peter.

"I'm sorry, you know."

"Sorry for what?" Peter said softly.

"Sorry for hurting you."

Peter searched Neal's face for some sign of life; something, anything that once belonged to him. He feared whether his wildly confident and boisterous love of life would ever return to him. He couldn't go on like this forever. He would have burned down the house right there on the spot if Neal asked him. If only he would ask him for something, anything. He thought he could always tell when Neal was lying. He knew a lie. That's different from knowing the truth. Now that Neal had stopped lying, he felt lost.

Neal slipped on the red thermal vest and walked out the door. Peter let him go. He wanted to say y_ou are still you. Come back to us. _Instead he said "Don't stay out too long. It looks like snow." He turned back to his pot just in time as it came to a boil.

Peter…solid, straight and confident in his goodness. Turns out, Peter was the better confidence man. _Work hard, swing for the fences, anything was possible. _Peter sold hope and he took the deal with both hands. He let it rise in him like a burning sun and lull him to sleep in the moonlight with dreams long forgotten. Hope put down tender roots. He let it fall on him like rain. It had all gone wrong somehow. He had done everything wrong. He never meant to hurt anyone and in the end he had hurt everyone.

He felt baffled and confused, as if he tumbled into a dream and waking up wasn't an option. His heart hurt. He couldn't tell if it was his real heart or his dream heart. He walked on, the woods were silent. He reached the clearing, but continued to walk as the last light of the day went. All he could hear was his own uneven breathing as the snow fell and kept on falling.


	3. Chapter 3

**BABY GIRL**

**Chapter 3**

Annie Turner wasn't an easy person to love. She was impulsive and irresponsible, had no interest in setting the world right, loved thunderstorms and shied away from men who were good to her. So it came as no surprise when the father of her baby said he wasn't ready for that kind of commitment.

"I don't know, he said. Having a kid is not my thing. I'm not ready to be a father. You understand that don't you?"

She wasted no time thinking about why he stopped loving her. Falling out of love with her she understood, but how could a man not commit to his own child, the life growing inside her?

She packed her bags and moved upstate. The small clapboard cabin was miles away from everything. A perfect refuge. It was the only thing her father had ever given her, beside her crappy life. She remembered visiting the cabin when she was a little girl. Her mother made her sit in the car while she went in to collect the money her father was supposed to provide for her. They always argued. Her mother wasn't easy to love either.

Sometimes she hated her mother. She didn't understand why of all places Annie would move to her father's cabin. Annie hadn't seen or spoken to him in years before his death. Her mother pressured her to sell the old cabin and use the money to finish up her degree. Annie never finished anything. Her mother didn't approve most of her choices, including the baby. Why bring a baby into this mess of her life? How could a baby make it better?

After all, Annie wasn't one of these women who yearned for a baby and got all weak in the knees over strollers and baby clothes. She was unsentimental as she was selfish, something she and her mother shared. "_You have your whole life in front of you. Don't turn away from me, Annie. I know what I'm talking about. This will change everything."_ Her mother was an angry woman and there were reasons for that. She knew her mother wished she hadn't had her all along and oddly she felt a certain sympathy for her.

Annie could have stopped it. What did she want from this baby, anyhow? Maybe it was selfish, greedy even; another bad choice in a mass of bad choices so wide she could wrap herself up in them like a quilt. But the moment she knew she was pregnant she felt something change in her. It was irrevocable and that was fine with her. The one sure thing she knew, she was keeping it. So she gassed up the van and headed upstate.

She was a city girl, she didn't like fresh air. She thought she would go nuts at first. It was odd living in a town where everyone knew you. Even stranger because everyone had known her father. Mrs. Teller who ran the ice cream parlor said she was the spitting image of him. Mrs. Teller and her dad went to high school together, she could tell she still had a soft spot for him. She never charged for Annie's ice cream sundaes, once she found out she was Jack Turner's daughter. He liked sundaes too.

"Jack Turner was a wild one. You look so much like him, the same black hair and green eyes. He liked living in the moment, the here and now. He had a nose for trouble that boy, liked the feel of his blood running hot."

"Why would he move back here?" Annie seemed puzzled.

"Oh that's easy. When he found out he was having a baby, he was a changed man. Said it was the only time he felt connected to anything. He moved back here and built that cabin with his own two hands the summer before you were born. It broke his heart when your mom kept you from him."

After that conversation Annie would sometime imagine she saw Jack Turner in the corners of the small rooms of the cabin, in the shadows watching over her. She looked in the mirror for traces of him in her green eyes and the mass of black hair she always hated didn't look so bad. She began taking classes online to complete her degree. This baby needed someone responsible, this baby needed her.

Daniel had been texting, seems he was having second thoughts about fatherhood. She wasn't heroic like those girls in the movies, she didn't want to be alone like her mother and she wanted her baby to have a father. She asked him to come up that weekend. Maybe things could be different and not written in stone this time around for the Turner women.

For the first time, she felt settled. She was enormous. Her due date was three weeks away. So when the first pain hit, it took her a moment to figure out what had happened, it was a contraction. She was breathing hard by the time she packed a bag and got behind the wheel of the van. It was already late, the sky was grey and hazy and the first flurries had begun to fall. She could tell a storm was coming.

Another spasm of pain shook her frame and she felt a warm sensation between her legs, her water must have broken. She reached down and her hand came back tinged with blood. "No, no. This can't be happening. Stay calm, stay sane," she told herself. She bit her lip and did her best to stay focused. It was dark already and two inches of fresh snow were on the road, when she saw the man step out of the woods as if he was sleepwalking. The headlights illuminated the red vest he wore. Her hands slipped on the wheel. Her fatigue and tension caused an overreaction, she yanked the wheel and the van began to skid. Snow dammed up under the front tires and it lost traction.

_**wcwcwcwcwcwcw**_

His world was already half in a dream. He was lost. He didn't know how far he had come. The snow was falling harder and the temperature was dropping like a stone. He needed to turn back. Peter would be worried. Then he heard it, the engine and tires crushing over snow.

He glanced up just in time to see the oncoming headlights. For a moment it's as if the world is paralyzed. He couldn't even muster up a pathetic attempt to escape. He braced for the impact, but at the very last moment the car swerved and fish tailed into the ditch.

Blinking a little, with legs unsteady from the adrenaline rushing through his veins, Neal started toward the car. He jumped down into the ditch and fought through the snow to reach the van door. He could barely make out a lone figure slumped across the wheel. He climbed inside. The freezing air blew in with him on thick clouds of snow.

"I'm cold," the woman said. The shock of the accident still on her face as the snow flurries settled on her heavy coat.

"I'm sorry, sorry," he'd begun to tremble too as the shock passed over him. "Are you hurt?"

"I'm having a baby."

She tried to turn her body toward him. Her eyes were astonishingly green, wide and open like a frightened child's, but her voice was calm. I think my water broke, but I can't keep it from running out. I'm getting everything wet."

He looked at her pregnant belly and then at the blood stain rapidly spreading across the seat. It was bad, really bad. His heart was pounding.

"I need to get you to a hospital."

Her face changed as another contraction came, she closed her eyes and grimaced in pain. Annie breathed the way they had taught her in her class until it subsided. She looked up at the man whose hand she grabbed onto, and saw the desperation and fear in his eyes.

"What's your name?" she searched his face and smiled. "I'm Annie."

"I'm Neal," he said.

"We don't have time, Neal. The baby is coming."

"I can't…I can't do this. I can't help you."

"Yes you can," Annie would will all of her strength into him if she could. He was the only chance of the baby surviving now. "We need you."

###

**Author's Note**

Thank you all for the reviews and kind comments. I know this is a melancholy piece, I wrote it when I was feeling a bit blue over the ending of WC, but it's not quite as bleak as it may seem. I'm actually pretty excited to see the last six episodes of White Collar. I hope you hang in there with me and Neal.


	4. Chapter 4

**BABY GIRL**

**Chapter 4**

Neal stepped up on to the icy road. Blowing snow pelted his face as he ran to the rear corner of the van. It was half on and half off the shoulder, it wasn't going anywhere. There was no way short of a tow truck to get it out. He searched the distance for headlights, there was nothing but white as far he could see. No one would be out in this weather tonight, if they didn't have to be. With no cell service and the roads impassable they were on their own.

He felt dizzy. He couldn't get the blood soaked car seat out of his head. No one could survive the amount of blood that had poured out of her, but she had to survive. After telling a thousand lies, what difference would one more make? He shouted into the dark.

He ran back and ducked into the van bringing a flurry of snow with him, his hands were trembling and his heart pounding. He was seriously cold and the interior of the van was already cooling.

"It's bad out there, isn't it?" Annie looked over at him shivering. "Can you get us out of this ditch?"

"I don't think so. We need to keep the engine running. Keep the heater going. You need to lie down. Do you think you can move to the back here, if I help you?"

She took his arm and he helped her to the back of the van. His trembling subsided a bit but hers continued. He used her coat to form a makeshift pillow and a blanket he found to cover her in. Annie's brow was wrinkled and she was inhaling and exhaling rapidly, her face twisted and sweaty. He felt powerless as he sat there and watched her grimace in pain.

"How are you feeling?" he said softly once she relaxed some.

"The contractions are coming faster. I'm not due for another three weeks," she rubbed her hand across her huge stomach. "I think something's torn inside, my legs feel numb," she clutched his hand.

"What can I do?" Neal asked her.

"Can you lift me?" Her eyes were a mixture of fear and calm. It was like looking into a mirror. He came around behind her and lifted her into a sitting position.

"Is that better?" he leaned forward, affected in a way he didn't understand.

"Oh, much better," Annie said. He could hear relief in her voice this time. She shifted and leaned her head against his chest. She could feel the steady beat of his heart. She had felt angry and confused for so long, it was still a surprise to be done with it, to not be weighted down with disappointment. She'd always run away from love, given away her dreams along with herself. It wasn't until the baby that she finally found something worth keeping. It wasn't fair, this wasn't fair.

"Why were you out here in the woods alone?" she looked up at him.

"It's not important."

"Please, tell me."

He realized she needed some connection some attachment, after all he was a complete stranger. It still seemed like a dream how their lives crossed at this single point in the woods.

"I was trying to run away from my life," Neal said matter of fact.

"I use to be an expert at that, could give a master class," Annie's smile was interrupted by another contraction. She began her breathing, her eyes closed, her face a screwed up mask of desperation and pain. She clenched his hand tightly until it slowly subsided. He knew she smiled to ease his worry. Neal filled a cup he found upfront with snow. He wet a cloth he found in Annie's bag in the melting snow and wiped her brow and neck.

"Hey," he said. How are you?"

"I'm glad you're here. Do you have children? I'm sorry I don't mean to pry," she was breathing hard.

"It's okay," he pressed the cool cloth to her temple. "No I don't, but I want to." He thought of Kate, their life the way it might have been, their joy, their plans, the babies they dreamed of, now all swallowed up in flames. He felt the same helplessness then as he did now, the same pain.

"I never wanted to get pregnant, it was a surprise to everyone including me when I decided to keep the baby. I'm not the most responsible person, but it felt right. Do you know what I mean? Have you ever felt that way?" she was pale and shaking like a leaf.

"What does it feel like?" Neal leaned in closer.

"It felt wonderful. I was never sick. I can't explain it but everything was different. I felt full, for the very first time in my life I felt full. I never thought I'd fall in love. I didn't think I was capable of it, until I felt the baby growing in me and I just fell in love."

"And the father, how does he feel? Do you love him?" Neal ran his hands up and down her arms to try to warm her.

"I don't know. I was crazy about him. He was gorgeous, like you but younger." Another contraction came, like an earthquake, harder than the last. Her face was red and her temples pulsed, he could feel the strain of her muscles as she labored to bring this baby into the world. Each round took more out of her, but she was determined.

His admiration for her expanded with every contraction. They were coming like waves now, threatening to take her under and him along with her. But she wouldn't give up her struggle and neither would he and the tiny baby struggling too to be born. He poured himself into helping her as she began to push. A crimson spot was spreading across her back and momentarily he let himself be over taken with sorrow.

"Daniel, that's the baby's father. He's got a good heart, he just got scared." Her black hair was in ringlets plastered to her neck from the sweat. He held her as the frightened child's face transformed into an older, wiser woman in an ancient line of women from the beginning who labored to bring life into this world.

"I need you to do something for me."

"Anything."

"Daniel's number and address are in my wallet. Make sure he knows where to find the baby."

"Don't, Annie," Neal felt stricken. This can not happen to her he thought.

"Promise me," her voice was almost a sob.

He harbored a thousand illusions about love, but this was love. This is what love looked like, panicked, weighted down with devotion and loyalty, filled with hope and struggle. His strength coming back to him, he felt a power greater than anything he had before. He was finally doing something that was so right, he was part of love coming into the world. He felt alive.

"I promise you, Annie."

"It's coming, I can feel it." She pushed with all she had, everything exploded. The baby was being born.

He knelt down before her, his hands moving with such grace and speed. The tiny head slipped out, and for a moment he could barely breathe. He never experienced anything of the magnitude and beauty he was witness to in that moment. His heart felt as if would burst from the joy he felt.

"It's a girl," Annie. He laid the baby in her arms.

Her pulse was rapidly dropping, her heart beat fading into an ocean of love. Annie looked right into Neal's eyes. She looked so beautiful to him, alight from devotion. A falling star, all her work done.

"Thank you," she managed to say. He wasn't ready for it. Annie held the baby close and for a moment their breathing synchronized. It was time, she knew she had to say goodbye.

"Don't be afraid baby girl," she said. "I have to let you go," her tears softly falling on the perfect little head. Neal moved in closer as her breathing slowed. They were face to face. Annie said something Neal struggled to hear, he put his ear close to her mouth. "Go," he thought he heard her say and it was over.

tbc


	5. Chapter 5

**BABY GIRL**

**Chapter 5 **

He stepped into the snow, moving carefully a layer of ice was just below it. Neal looked down at the tiny baby bundled against his chest. He'd wrapped her in a pink blanket he found in Annie's bag and carefully zipped her under his thermal vest. He held the tiny head filled with spiky black hair in the palm of his hand against his shoulder. He watched her breathe and every tiny breath was precious.

The trees were so dense and tangled he couldn't see the moon. He was moving more by instinct than any certainty of where he was. If he could make it back to the clearance, Peter and the cabin wouldn't be much farther.

The woods were unearthly quiet, save for the tiny yelps the baby made, much like a small kitten. She was easily soothed with a pat on the back. "That's it baby girl," she looked up at him with deep green watchful eyes.

Neal was shivering but he forced himself to be steady. He fought the cold and snow soaking through his jacket. If he went in the wrong direction, they would die. He couldn't let panic overtake him, the first wave of losing Annie had passed over him. He felt her now, the supremacy of her love guiding them through the veil of falling snow.

Together they had traveled more than a lifetime in the brief time they knew each other. They witnessed the future being born, he looked down at the tiny baby cradled against his chest. This was real, this was life; not something he dreamed to protect himself from sorrow. He wanted to love again, to have a bridge to the future, to see the possibility of himself moving forward. He was coming awake.

He barely realized he'd been running when he stopped momentarily under a canopy of pines to catch his breath. "Move faster," he whispered to himself. "Go," he could hear Annie's voice echo in his head. With every step he wished for only one thing, for her baby to live. He made a promise to the night, in the well of time spreading out beyond him. Annie's baby would live, he would make certain of it. In the darkness of the woods a light flickered in his eyes.

**Wcwc**

The falling snow was gaining muster, at least four more inches had fallen since Neal left. The temperature continued to plummet. These woods were dangerous at night. Peter tried to swallow down the lump in his throat. He swept the beam from his flashlight in an arc, back and forth from side to side. Fat heavy flakes swirled around him.

He thought he saw a shadow moving in the darkness. He made another pass with his flashlight and this time caught a patch of red through the trees.

"Neal!" he shouted running forward his legs and chest burning from the strain. "I've been searching for you. What in God's earth were you thinking? You could freeze to death out here."

Peter waved the flashlight over Neal and saw bloodstains on his red vest and jacket.

"Is that blood?" panic rising in his chest.

"It's not mine, Peter."

"Neal talk to me," and as if on cue the baby cried out, despite her calm temperament, her cries pierced through the cold night. Peter reached out his hand toward the bundle under Neal's red vest, his head was spinning. "Neal? Whose baby is this? What happened?"

"Her mother died. I'll tell you everything, later. Right now we have to get her warm."

All the pain and loss was gone from Neal's face, what remained was a fierce look of determination, a fire burning in his eyes… all Peter's questions dissolved in his throat.

"All right," he said. They needed to get back as quickly as possible, Neal's jeans were wet to his knees and icy crystals matted his hair. How he had come this far was a miracle, but he wouldn't make it much longer and neither would the tiny face looking up at him if they didn't get to shelter.

"We got a problem." Peter wrapped the heavy parka he was carrying around Neal and the baby, checking for frostbite.

"What kind of problem?" Neal asked teeth chattering.

"Before I lost cell service I called the sheriff's office to have them help look for you. The storm caused a major pile up north of here and everyone's working it. The roads are closed both ways."

"Peter, we have to get her to a hospital."

"There's a back road to town from the lake. I think Dad's old truck can get through. Stay close and follow me, the clearing is just ahead."

The way back was tough going. Neal at Peter's shoulder as they follow his tracks back to the clearing, the moon had finally appeared in the sky. Before long they could see the light from the cabin ahead. Peter threw open the door taking the stairs two at a time to his bedroom. He snatched up a handful of towels, flannel shirts… anything he could find to warm Neal and the baby.

Neal frantically stripped away his jacket and opened his vest, he looked down at the tiny face and her eyes were closed, her lips tinged with blue. He put the back of his hand to her small mouth, she was breathing. He tore away the cold blanket and started to massage her tiny feet and arms. He looked up at Peter who was standing next to him now.

"Hand me that," he said pointing to the flannel shirt Peter was holding in his hand. He wrapped the baby snuggly into it. Her cheeks began to pink up and small wails filled the cabin.

"Atta girl. That's good," he said. Neal could feel her warmth returning, her certainty, and Annie's breath coursing through her. He half expected to see her standing there.

Peter was looking at him as if he had just realized something again. He could see it clearly, the change he prayed for had come to his friend, it had come the way he always expected…through his heart. It was if everything Neal owned or ever wanted was wrapped up in that flannel shirt.

"I'm going to warm up the truck." Peter stepped into the snow, quickly crossed the drive and slid into his Dad's old truck glistening with snow in the moonlight. He pulled the choke and turned the ignition. "C'mon," Peter prayed. He listened for the little cough of life as the trusty old truck came to life. He got the heat going and returned to the cabin.

"Is it running," Neal looked up at him anxiously holding the baby, her skin was pinker as her face poked out from under the folds of flannel.

"Yeah, give her to me. Change, you're soaking wet."

"Okay, thank you Peter.

The truck was warm and easily took the snow packed road. The tires didn't have much traction, but Peter knew these roads he and his father had travelled many times on endless fishing and camping trips. He touched Neal gently on the shoulder and gunned the engine. They didn't speak on the ride in, they didn't have to as Neal concentrated on the small bundle in his lap.

Once the baby disappeared into the wide doors behind the emergency room entrance, Neal sat in a plastic chair put his head back and closed his eyes. Peter took the opportunity to make some calls.

"The highway patrol found the van and recovered Annie's body. I called the baby's father. He's on his way up." Peter looked down at Neal, "Any word?"

"Not yet. Peter, I…" Neal's voice began to crack.

"It's okay, buddy. You saved her life." He sat down next to Neal and wrapped his arm around his shoulder and waited on news. They both stood as the door opened and the doctor approached. Are you here for baby girl Turner?"

"Yes, how is she? Is she okay?" Neal asked nervously.

"She's doing just fine," the doctor smiled. "You can see her in just a bit."

Neal sat back down in the plastic chair. Having successfully protected himself from grief these past months, he collapsed in Peter's arms and cried. For so long he had felt nothing, now it was so much, to feel so much. Peter could see it in his eyes as he held him. Peter smiled and thought _At last._

After some time Neal shifted, wiped his eyes with the palms of his hands and looked over to Peter.

"I want your forgiveness."

"Why?" Peter said gently.

"Because I can't stay. I can't live my life in a two-mile radius. I'm sorry."

He thought about Annie kissing her baby goodbye, her devotion to escaping the past, her duty to try. He thought about Peter's force field, about the honorable man next to him who had faith in him when he'd given up. He thought about the baby, the bewitching beautiful creature who made the rest of the world fall away.

"You were right, Peter. It's possible to forge a new life… a future and I want to try. I want my freedom, Peter."

They could both feel the truth in it. Peter held Neal tightly as though he'd never loosen his grip, but he would. He knew he couldn't keep him. He didn't want to. He knew one day soon Neal would run and on that day he wouldn't chase him. Peter would let him go, but tonight was not that night.

The end.


End file.
